With Kindness, Love, and Listening

Photo found online

It was a simpler time. A time when bare feet pounded the grass at high speed. The sun shone down on our sunscreen-free skin. Climbing the roof of the house and chicken coop, hanging upside-down from the clothesline post, and climbing trees to read a book were considered normal childhood. Playing in the woods with neighbors. Adventure was out there for us to find.

School-age became a more complicated time. Along with the fun classes like recess and lunch, a young child learned more than the mandatory subject lessons taught. The perfect world seemed to grow dim and cold between everyone's competitive spirit of gossip and one-upping. Whispers behind others backs were taught on their own. Judgement over clothing started way too early. Name-calling was at an all time high. Insecurity rang out like the lunch bell. Bullying ran rampant without a name. Not to mention the long bus ride.

Now enter the age of technology where one can sit behind a computer, hit send and the whole world can see ones thoughts. Instead of meanness showing up on the playground, it shows up in comments where one can be anonymous or just a name.

Words do hurt contrary to the nursery lie rhyme. It's so easy to read a tweet, text, status or the millions of other ways social media pops up and misread the person's intentions. For some reason, just because we can type characters to form words, it gives us a "right" to tell everyone what we think. Sometimes in the most harsh words.

Take the hot topic of immunizations, for example. What ever happened to talking to a person who decided against immunizations and find out his/her reasoning? But, we feel as though we have the 'right' to spout off about how irresponsible it is among a whole host of other negative, judging words. What ever happened to two sides of the story? What ever happened to communication and active listening?

The problem with emails, texts and all social forms is the unknown "tone" of the words. Tone of voice can be heard with phone calls and eye-to-eye conversations. Typed or written words...not so much.

Do Christians need to speak up on certain topics when the only form of communication seems to be through social media or blogs? You bet. But, do it with kindness, love and in the 'tone' of wanting to hear that person's view so we can all understand where we are all coming from.

Am I opinionated? Ummmm....yes. If someone asks me my opinion, I don't usually hold back. Is that a problem? It can be. I try to say things in love and understanding but I have a long way to go. Sometimes I find myself writing a comment only to erase it and move on. Sometimes I have to delete an email so I don't respond. It's a battle against the 'mean-girl'.

Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.                                          Proverbs 16:24

It's Okay...

This is part of a note I sent someone who is battling cancer. However, it can apply to any struggle we have in our lives from a child who is ill to caring for a parent.

It's okay. It's okay to break down, pound your fist on the steering wheel and wonder how this has happened to you. It's okay to cry. it's okay to be angry. It's okay to put yourself first even though it is an unnatural thing for a mom, wife and woman to do. It's okay to feel torn between caring for yourself and caring for your family. It's okay to feel overwhelmed and want to scream. It's okay.

It.is.okay. God is still God. You love Him and He is madly in love with you. You are never alone. He hurts with you in this broken world. You cling to His Word and find strength from it and through it. And, just because you have feelings and emotions other than the "good church girl" kind, does not make that love you and God have for each other any less powerful. He knows you. He put those emotions in you and He knows why. He is there hold you as you cry and wonder. It does not make your faith any less...He's hold on to you even more than we all realize. He is working wonders in your life, your family and friends’ lives.

We, woman, have so many masks. If we show the slightest crack in our masks, we feel others may judge us as one of little faith. If our Joy mask isn't on tight enough and we get cranky then the joy of the Lord isn't our strength; what lies we believe. What lies we tell others. We are taught to be "good girls" but it also tells us to put on our mask. I've learned the hard ways "it's okay..."

Blessing to you as you watch God do wonders and experience His presence and miracles first hand. 

The Post I Thought Was Posted

***Oops! So apparently I'm 'losing' it in more ways than one. I thought I had already posted at the beginning of the year! Funny. So, go grab a cup of coffee, tea, hot chocolate or what have you and sit back and read the story of taking our daughter to the airport one early, early crisp morning.***

Once upon a time, because all good stories start that way. Problem is, there is so much to tell and too many words to write.

Dancer Daughter was home for Christmas. So, so, so good to have her home. Yet when she went back I had peace. The peace only God can give. No tears, which if you know me is a huge deal. Sad? Yes. Tears? No...but come close and I'll whisper that it was still hard seeing her walk way.

I had to take her back to the airport since hubs could not get off of work. I was so nervous about it. I was having dreams about it a month prior. Yes, it's ok. Shake your head, I am right now. The reason I was nervous? Middle of winter in Ohio and I hate driving on busy highways. Yes, I used the word hate. Oh, and did I mention we had to leave our house between 2 and 2:30 AM? And, of course, I went to bed at 7 that night and what time do you think I fell into a fitful sleep? Yup, almost 10. Then I was naturally awake at 1 AM because "what if the alarm doesn't go off?!" Doesn't that always happen?! So, it was me, Dancer Daughter and Firefighter Son.

And, here are the things I learned that day and it wasn't even 8 AM:

• At 2:30 a.m. you'll rarely get stopped by a red light therefore making better time than what you had planned. 
• Semis are not out and about at that time of night morning. Yay for me. Trucks make me nervous. They are big. They tend to sway and get really close to the dotted line especially when being passed. 
• All highways need to have reflectors IN their roads so you know where the road is going when you aren't friends with the road yet. Yes, Michigan, I'm talking to you. 
• If you slow down because you can't figure out where the road it going (see point above) and allow the guy a mile behind you to catch up and zoom around you, you'll have a much better idea where the road is going...unless he goes off the road then you're both in trouble (that didn't happen but it could have...).
• It was discovered road signs are sprayed with a solution so when it does snow the snow/ice doesn't stick to the signs. However, that makes the signs dirty and non-reflective. So, if you do not know where you are going in the middle of the dark morning, so sorry for you. 
• Airline check-ins are not open at 3:40 a.m. (see the first point) However, it does make one feel like one is participating in the Amazing Race and all the teams now catch up with one another. ;)
• Firefighter Son and I were obviously not suppose to get cappuccinos at 4 a.m. since the gas station in which we stopped was "still waiting for the parts". Insert angry eyes here.
• Semis begin to grace the highways with their presence at 4 a.m. And, be careful passing said semis that early in the morning because you'll never know what is in the passing lane. Dead animal, I'm talking to you.
• A certain doughnut/coffee place does not have fresh, or any kind, of doughnut available at 5 a.m. And, while we are taking about this, the dining room does not open until 6. Apparently I should have figured that out with the lack of cars in the parking lot. But, according to the sign, the drive-thru is open all night. Employees, what are you doing there all night if not making doughnuts? I needed a sugar high for the rest of the drive home, lady!
• Don't tick off the drive-thru lady (see above) by asking about doughnuts, in which she says you can't have any, and then asking her to wait while you decided on a hot drink. Don't place your order and then say, "Hello?" (so it was three times) because all you heard was deafening silence. Could that be why my hot drink didn't taste good...at all?! Even when I got home and doctored it up...blick.
• And finally, when driving with a teenage son expect to learn all kinds of random information. (loved every part of that!)

Dancer Daughter made it safe and sound to her location. We made it home safe and sound even before hubs had to leave for work leaving him with a nice toasty vehicle to drive (you're welcome hun). 

Christmas is Coming to Town

Did you know Christmas is 14 days away. Yup, I checked here and it says it is so it must be true.

But, did you know Spring is only 100 days away? Whaaattt?! I know. Minding.blowing. Now that is something I can get excited about!

Okay, back to Christmas. How are you doing? Presents, decorations, Christmas cards/letters to mail, menu planning, baking....stress levels?

Just a word (or three) of advice/encouragement: It's okay not to do all the "traditions" that everyone else does. It's okay not to feel 100% joyful during this time of jolly when you feel as though breathing and taking the next step is all you can do. Yet, if you want to light every corner of your house and yard...go for it. Don't worry about what others are "doing" or not "doing".

What if we gave more than we received. What if we knew a family struggling to take that next step and we stepped in to help make Christmas special for their children and them. What if we just smiled at a person and said hello instead of numbly and hurriedly walking past.

Remember the whole reason we celebrate Christmas. Jesus was born. God's Son. God's gift to us. God loves you so much. Breathe that in. Think about His unending love and grace. Let that be your Christmas. Let that be your 365 days of the year.

And, then remember....only 100 days until spring!!! ☺

When it doesn't seem fair

I'm sorry. I'm sorry your team didn't get in the final tournament. I'm sorry if you are a player for a team that didn't do well. It's very disappointing. It's okay to feel that way....for a time. What ifs won't help. Look ahead, not behind. Easier said than done? You bet.

I'm not belittling your feelings. I'm not. Really. Everyone has disappointments. Everyone has failures. Most of us want to cry when things are hard. It's okay. It's hard for you, right now. Give yourself some time.

When I'm going through 'stuff', I find it helpful to look outside of myself and my circumstance:

• I'm loved by the King, the Creator of the universe and me. Will I have trials? You bet. It's a fallen world.
• Others have it far worse:
• Homelessness
• Being sold into slavery - here and in other countries
• Illnesses that are not curable or seem to drag on forever
• Racism and reverse racism
• All sexual sins
• Wondering where and when the next meal will come from
• Loss of a job and can't find work
• Not being able to provide gifts for your children
• Pain that will not go away no matter the medication
• Loss of loved ones through death, kidnapping, estranged relationship
• and the list could go on and on....
• This trial will make me stronger, braver, help me understand others better and will change me even if I can't see the joy in the situation at the moment. 
• Perhaps God will use this time in my life to help someone who is or will be going through the same thing I am.

A little dose of perspective always helps me. 

What are some things you do or think about when going through a rough patch?

A World Full of Words

I like to think of myself as an encourager. The person behind someone whispering 'You can do it. Don't let doubt take over." Words can be beautiful. Words can be what a person needs. Words can also be was a person doesn't need.

Sometimes, no matter how hard I try, my tongue becomes very sharp and hurtful. It's like I'm having an out of body experience; I'm watching those words fly out of my mouth and I can't reign in the hurt. Am I the only one?

That sticks and stones rhyme? Yeah, big fat lie. I heard one speaker say, when talking about hurtful words and marriage, "Words are atomic bombs." Words can mushroom and get out of control hurting those in the path. 

But, that person deserved to be "told off". Or, I held it in so long I just sort of exploded. Poor excuses, I have don't I. I'm learning to be silent but oh how hard that is at times. Do I fail? You bet your boots! Oh, how I need Him. I'm so glad He doesn't give up on me like I deserve!

I was listening to Oh How I Need You by All Sons & Daughters. They are sort of indie/country. Yes, those who know me know I'm not fond of country music. There are some instruments that, frankly, get on my nerves in country songs. So, having said that I really love this song. Listen to the video and see if you agree. 

Let my life be for Your Glory

Woven in Your threads of grace...

Catchy little thing isn't it?! ;)

Beacons of Hope - Love Unexpected Review

All I ever wanted was a home. That's it. A home of my very own. A home to decorate. A home to invite others in and make them feel special. I just didn't know the emotionally exhausting wave I had to ride to get it.

I'm Emma. My story is a long one but full of hope, faith and forgiveness. However, it took me a long time to get to the point of having hope. You see, I'm not very sure of myself and I wondered how God could let so many things happen to me and my family. I gave up hope and faith for a very long time. But then, something happened and changed everything.

Patrick and his son, Josiah, entered my life in most unusual turn of events. My mind still reels as I think back on all that happened leading up to me becoming a wife and mother. Did you ever have a moment in your life when you made a life changing decision and five minutes later you wonder what did I just get myself into?! Yes, it was just like that.

When we, well Patrick, rowed the boat around the bend and I saw our lighthouse and house, I knew in my heart I would make the house my own and love the son who just became mine. We had many ups and downs as all married couple do. Except, we really only knew one another a few minutes before Holy Bill pronounced us husband and wife. I still get dizzy when I remember how our lives rolled through some huge waves in the beginning. 

I've changed since the turbulent beginning. Come join my story. Author, Jody Hedlund penned a book recording Patrick and my adventures. It's written beautifully, honestly and shows how hope, love, faith and forgiveness can turn many lives around. 

His humble servant,

Emma

Love Unexpected: Beacons of Hope Book 1

Also enjoy Jody's FREE ebook novella, Out of the Storm, to whet your appetite for this series. Plus it has the first five chapters of Love Unexpected neatly tucked away in the end of the novella. Win-win. What more could you want?! 

I really enjoyed both the novella and Love Unexpected. I would highly recommend any book written by the historic Christian fiction master, Jody Hedlund. Find a list of all of her books here. You won't be sorry....well, your shirk your responsibilities once you read the first page because you can't put it down but responsibilities are overrated anyway! 

While reading Love Unexpected, this song popped into my head. Enjoy!