This is part of a note I sent someone who is battling cancer. However, it can apply to any struggle we have in our lives from a child who is ill to caring for a parent.
It's okay. It's okay to break down, pound your fist on the steering wheel and wonder how this has happened to you. It's okay to cry. it's okay to be angry. It's okay to put yourself first even though it is an unnatural thing for a mom, wife and woman to do. It's okay to feel torn between caring for yourself and caring for your family. It's okay to feel overwhelmed and want to scream. It's okay.
It.is.okay. God is still God. You love Him and He is madly in love with you. You are never alone. He hurts with you in this broken world. You cling to His Word and find strength from it and through it. And, just because you have feelings and emotions other than the "good church girl" kind, does not make that love you and God have for each other any less powerful. He knows you. He put those emotions in you and He knows why. He is there hold you as you cry and wonder. It does not make your faith any less...He's hold on to you even more than we all realize. He is working wonders in your life, your family and friends’ lives.
We, woman, have so many masks. If we show the slightest crack in our masks, we feel others may judge us as one of little faith. If our Joy mask isn't on tight enough and we get cranky then the joy of the Lord isn't our strength; what lies we believe. What lies we tell others. We are taught to be "good girls" but it also tells us to put on our mask. I've learned the hard ways "it's okay..."
Blessing to you as you watch God do wonders and experience His presence and miracles first hand.